As heard by @JustinTheLibSoc
Glen (Con): We are privatising the Royal Mail, giving 90% of the shares to millionaires!
PM: This was the Labour Party’s policy!
Ed M: <3 Andy Murray & Virginia Wade. How much cash did you get from hedge funds?
PM: We publish our donors. No-one gives a shit
Ed M: Tories gets £25 million from hedge funds & gave them a tax cut!
PM: Still have higher taxes on the rich than Labour’s govt
Ed M: We get 6p a week from ordinary people. Cap donation from all groups.
PM: You get MILLIONS OF QUID FROM MILLONS of workers!
Ed M: You are bottling it, fucking coward. End directorship jobs for MPs!
PM: Current rules are appropriate & are being followed
Ed M: Answer the question, dickhead! No well-paid second jobs for MPs!
PM: Err… this is about trade unions! Unite is EVIL
Ed M: You’re the lackey of hedge funds & we are the party of the workers.
PM: Labour is the lapdog of trade union bureaucrats!
Huppert (LD): Let’s clean up our air which affects heart failure costs 1 million NHS beds a year.
PM: Good point, will do.
Blomfield (Lab): Tories ignoring local exploiters in my patch. Funding your own I see.
PM: Exploitation is up in your patch!
Spencer (Con): We are having a fucking referendum on the EU. Labour don’t give a shit.
PM: Labour haven’t decided. What a joke.
Dakin (Lab): Tories kept dodgy money, pay it back
PM: Labour has taken £1.6 million from a donor + showed him how to avoid tax!
Sandys (Con): Brilliant! This government forcing more people into exploitation!
PM: Indeed, long may it continue
Robinson (Lab): You still haven’t fixed construction jobs.
PM: It is getting better than Labour’s efforts so dance a jig.
Rees-Mogg (Con): European Union laws are being used by this government! Horrific.
PM: We’re getting 98 EU powers back, you plum.
Seabeck (Lab): Welfare cuts mean that 9 out of 10 carers are facing eviction.
PM: Carers are exempt from #BedroomTax. Honest.
Latham (Con): Why we funding Kagame in Rwanda when he is supporting war lords?
PM: Crime is wrong but he makes me look good
Wilson (Lab): How many jobs should an MP have?
PM: I am proud that Labour and Tory MPs benefit by cosying up to capitalists!
Mulholland (LD): Murray proves Scottish people are great. Come to my patch to watch rugby
PM: More interested in the Ashes mate.
Sawford (Lab): You got £863,000 from Serco and gave them a hospital!
PM: Kiss my arse. You guys are bought by a social movement
Lord (Con): Great that we have ensured claimants can’t get receive enough to survive!
PM: We represent the interests of Britain.
Jamieson (Lab): Has donations from rich donors, resulted in interventions on their tax affairs?
PM: Labour are the corrupt shits
Kawcsynski (Con): Kids in my patch don’t get as much money as other parts. UNFAIR!
PM: We will get cross party support.
Goodman (Lab): Banking reforms are virtually useless. Payback for the bankers?
PM: What did Labour do again? Oh yeah Sir Shred!
Nuttall (Con): Bury will bury Lee Rigby. Let’s remember how much we love the army, the police and the state.
PM: You speak for all of us.
Lucas (Lab): How much did Hague get from JCB while in opposition?
PM: SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT JCB!
Reckless (Con): Ordinary trade unionists should vote Tory! McCluskey is shitbag.
Blackman-Woods (Lab): You got donations from building companies. Did they buy policy?
PM: No, we don’t work like Labour.
Burt (LD): Apprenticeship exploitation helps build a fair society. Let’s have more.
PM: Yes of course. Young people need enslavement.
Nash (Lab): Had a constituent who is threatening to take their own life because of welfare reform.
PM: Sad but it is necessary pain for the future. Labour won’t reverse it.
Carmichael (Con): Great, Swindon can get to Stroud. Money for my patch!
PM: Let’s boost your majority for 2015.
McCabe (Lab): Is Lynton Crosby the new McCarthy?
PM: Very good but you are a wankstain.
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